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Posts tagged calculus

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(We’re taking a calculus final. The TA is a well-known Lord of the Rings fan, and we’ve had running LotR jokes all semester.)
TA:
“Okay, guys, everyone look at me. We’ve been over the rules, but just in case: no notes, pencil your answers in on the scantron sheet, and graphing calculators only – no more ‘can I just used my cell phone’ nonsense.”
Student:
“[TA's name], my calculator batteries just died! What should I do?”
TA:
“Here, I’ve got a big box of spares.”
Student:
*struggling* “I can’t get this packaging open…”
Student 2:
“Here, I’ve got a pocket knife.”
TA:
“And I’ve got a pair of scissors if you need them.”
Student 3:
*from the back of the room* “OR MY AXE!”
(Everyone starts laughing.)
TA:
“The only axes allowed on the exam are in the graph section.”
(Everyone groans.)
TA:
“Oh, come on, you’re in a math class. Deal with the math jokes.”
(The professor enters with a stack of exams. With him are two exam proctors.)
Professor:
“Tolkien jokes already, [TA's name]?”
TA:
“Hey, I didn’t start it.”
(The professor starts handing stacks of exams to the TA and proctors.)
Professor:
“But I’m about to finish it. [TA], take these exams down the left flank. [Proctor 1], follow the desks down the center. [Proctor 2], take your exams right, along the wall.”
(At this point, many of the students have realized where this is going:
Theoden’s lines from ‘Return of the King.’)
Professor:
“Forth, and fear no problems! Solve! Solve, students of calculus! Points shall be taken, scores shall be splintered! A pencil day! A red-ink day! Until three thirty!”
(The professor pulls out a pencil, holding it out like a sword, and runs down the first row holding it out. Students hold up their pencils, hitting his as he passes.)
Professor:
“Solve now! Solve now! Solve to good grades and the class ending! MAAATH!”
Entire Class:
“MAAATH!”
Professor:
“MAAAAATH!”
Entire Class:
“MAAAAAATH!”
Professor:
“Forth, exam-takers!”
(The entire class rises to their feet and gives him a standing ovation. A week later, we get an email from the professor.)
Professor:
*at the end of the email* “PS: I appreciate all of you who wrote in their evaluations that I was the one professor to rule them all, but the best one yet was the student who called me ‘Mathrandir.’”

Filed under math puns lord of the rings calculus final

12 notes

Found this while looking through my calculus textbook. Maybe if Angela and Brian could bond over their shared love (or hate) of math problems with completely artificial “context”…

Found this while looking through my calculus textbook. Maybe if Angela and Brian could bond over their shared love (or hate) of math problems with completely artificial “context”…

Filed under math calculus funny

11 notes

sbmat131:

The Meanest Value Theorem: while spouting Monty Python lines, the point on the graph actually does illustrate the theorem from calculus, which says that a differentiable function over a closed and bounded interval has some point where its derivative equals the average (i.e., mean) change over the interval.

sbmat131:

The Meanest Value Theorem: while spouting Monty Python lines, the point on the graph actually does illustrate the theorem from calculus, which says that a differentiable function over a closed and bounded interval has some point where its derivative equals the average (i.e., mean) change over the interval.

Filed under math calculus mean value theorem monty python pun

26 notes

I’ve seen this image go around a few times in a couple of different formats, so I thought I’d add some information (which IMO makes the whole thing even funnier). First, it’s helpful to know a bit about the original story (“Verizon doesn’t know Dollars from Cents”). Second, e^(i*pi) equals -1, and the big sum with all the powers 1/2^n equals 1, so this is, in fact, a check for two-tenths of a cent. Click the link to the original story for the significance of that number.
I guess the issue was cleared up, but there’s more to the tale if you have time to read it…
In fine, the idea of engineers using calculus to vent anger makes me very happy.

I’ve seen this image go around a few times in a couple of different formats, so I thought I’d add some information (which IMO makes the whole thing even funnier). First, it’s helpful to know a bit about the original story (“Verizon doesn’t know Dollars from Cents”). Second, e^(i*pi) equals -1, and the big sum with all the powers 1/2^n equals 1, so this is, in fact, a check for two-tenths of a cent. Click the link to the original story for the significance of that number.

I guess the issue was cleared up, but there’s more to the tale if you have time to read it…

In fine, the idea of engineers using calculus to vent anger makes me very happy.

(Source: wentawaytotheskies, via sevenonmymind)

Filed under calculus funny check